Posted in Florida life everyday

T’Was the night before Christmas as my Alfie Beagle slept onnnn . Read this

Not a flamingo was stirring as we sang our Florida Christmas song.

The children I teach were all dancing the Florida floss

They were counting the hours until they slept just before the arrival of Santa Claus.

Out I went on the patio noticing noise & a clatter. When I noticed the palm trees are all flattened and I said what the hell is the matter?

When I noticed an old white bearded man with shorts and a vacation shirt, & he had on his furry Chris Kringle t hat was as red as my Christmas skirt.

He looked at me & I looked at him. I almost choked on my gingerbread cookies when he asked me if he could he come in. I slid the patio sliding glass door open and wide almost hit my shin. Welcome to Florida, I said with pride. So there is no snow but it’s cold enough for me to hide.

The jolly old elf who looked like he was dressed for a on vacation and laughed with glee.

Then he looked at me. He went tee hee .

He went back outside to his sleigh while the reindeer were dancing. He rolled in his tourist bag while they all on the patio started prancing.

He gave me 2 guitars — one 6 string and a 12. He reached in his bag again & smiled, and said this cello is from the elves. Then why did you to have it and that’s no bluter s . Reached in again and pulled out to Apple desktop computers. When I blinked and I turned my sunshiny Fla head, I heard a beep of a car and almost dropped dead.

Two elves got out and one was tall “we’ve been trying to negotiate this car since last fall.” They don’t like short people to drive their vehicles & stuff & we had to tell them it was seriously Florida you —- and enough was enough.

So Santa went back to the patio and he went back to his sleigh. I have some more stuff for your husband yippee yay flamingo hey hey.

I know that he needs 3 designer suits for court. Don’t worry, they’re his size with a long torso and pant legs just right, just short.

So off he went with no fuss and yelled with a sunshiny smile

Saying , This was nice , merry Christmas. Thanks mrs Florida child.

Throw me my northern coat .

Ok, I smiled.


I have lived here in the Tampa Bay area for over 40 years. I am a native of New York. The purpose of this blog is to show what it is like to live here and not vacation . This is Florida’s Daily life. Paradise has “moments” too. This blog attempts to reflect my Catholic Christian faith with balance and sunshine and a crack at holy humor. I have a real sense of humor. It is hot here .